But despite the difficulty, Bethany did admit that she felt empathy for her ex husband.

“It’s so sad because he—like the poor guy never had a shot,” she shared. “[He] was raised by this narcissist. He’s thrust into a marriage with a girl that’s not right for him. He’s doing the best that he can.”

She added, “It was just a mess all around.”

And while Bethany reiterated that it was the wrong marriage for both of them, she did add it was hard to think so negatively about it, “because I have an amazing daughter, and so, is anything wrong?”

The Dexter alum also detailed her life with the group in her upcoming memoir Dinner for Vampires: Life on a Cult TV Show (While Also in an Actual Cult), where she describes how she ended up joining in the first place.

“I had always been looking for a place to belong,” she told People. “It still looked normal and then it just morphed. But by the time it started morphing, I was too far into the relationships to notice.”

However, about 10 years after joining, she found that something was off about the community and realized she needed to get out.

“The stakes were so high,” she said. “They were my only friends. I was married into this group. I had built my entire life around it. If I admitted that I was wrong—everything else would come crumbling down.”